Leicester City 16 Wire 48

Remember when we gave the great white hope of Super League a touching up last time it was because Kevin Brown was injured? Well, this time it was the referee that cheated them out of it.

Ahh Warrington and those eight (EIGHT) dodgy tries.

Just like it was our fault when they were left out of Super League in 1996 and then Catalans’ fault when they were relegated last time.

I wonder whose fault it is that they’ve won the sum total of fuck all since everyone went professional? I’m blaming Brian Blessed or Princess Diana or Starbucks not paying enough tax but it’s definitely not their fault. OH THE HUMANITY! WON’T SOMEONE PLEASE THINK OF THE CHILDREN!

Anyway, less than 7500 crammed into the home of Liverpool Ladies to see Wire climb back to the top of the league with a comprehensive demolition of our nearest neighbours.

Widnes made a half decent start in their Penketh Paints Cup Final when Corey Thompson made a break right down the middle, but the poor man’s Justin Carney couldn’t capitalise of the defensive slip by Joe Westerman.

It looked at that point that it was going to be a long night. Wire – and more significantly Westerman – rallied. In light of the last couple of games, that in itself deserves credit.

Warrington opened the scoring on five minutes when fit again Kurt Gidley used Chris Hill’s hard line to throw a dummy and slipped through the Chemics’ defence to dot down. He even managed a conversion which has been a novelty in recent weeks.

Kev Penny grabbed his first of the night when Ben Currie’s huge Harbour Bridge pass found his man. Corey Thompson couldn’t get close to the former Wakey, Swinton and DHL winger who crossed in the corner to extend the lead. Gids again added. 12 up inside 10 minutes.

Easy.

Widnes then threatened a bit of a comeback when Matty Russell couldn’t collect bomb, but it did go dead, dead high so it definitely wasn’t his fault like.

(If it was Atkins or Ratchford that made that error, you’d have heard the boos at Bridge Foot, but Russell runs really fast so he gets with his errors scot free).

Mellor was grounded short and, after a pause of 10-15 minutes, reached out to plonk the ball over the line. Bloody Hicks not giving Widnes anything. Hanbury converted to bring Claudio Ranieri’s men back within 6 points.

The home fans were howling again when Hicks had the brass neck to dare to ping them for being offside.

Does he not know the 1989 World Champions are allowed to stand within 8 meters of the play the ball because they were good when Thatcher was Prime Minister? Fucking BOOOOOOO.

Off the back of Ratchford’s massive touch finder, Wire launched another attack. Gids slipped an inside ball to Joe Westerman who took three lacklustre defenders with him. Damn you Hicks you cheat, making Widnes tackle like they’re made of Monster Munch.

Seconds later Westerman had the ball stripped by three Widnes tacklers – play on, BOOOOOOOOO – and then we were done for offside as Widnes continued to get nothing from the biased man in the middle.

We’re labouring a point, but it makes us happy so fuck ‘em. The, erm, massed ranks’ claims that they were hard done by were obviously bollocks. Have we made that clear yet? Good.

Wire still had time to add another couple of tries before the half-time hooter.

First was Benny Westwood, on at prop, darting onto a short Daz Clark pass and then Westerman bagged his brace after a slow play the ball left the loose forward with nothing on, so he ran around a bit with a Widnesian on his back then touched down when he got bored. Gidley added on both occasions to keep his 100% record for the evening.

Tony Smith had said after the Fartown Fuck Up that he’d have us working hard in the week and it showed. We looked faster and sharper and Ratchford and Gidley were probing and having success against a piss poor Widnes defence. The game was won before we started the second half.

Just like the first half, Widnes started the better. Penny had jammed in and a long ball found Corey Thompson in loads of space and he went in unopposed. The conversion was pushed wide.

We weren’t worried, they’d shown nothing in the first half and this try did little to raise even the slightest of wobbles.

From the kick off, the resurgent Gidley smashed Man of Steel candidate Kevin Brown – obviously devoid of confidence – who drops the ball. Hicks decides it was stolen and gives Widnes a penalty.

After 15 minutes of one way traffic, Wire’s incessant pressure paid of just before the hour. Gidley used Atkins’ dummy run to combine with Stefan Ratchford whose pass gave Penny the chance to go past Corey Thompson on the outside again.

We were at it again shortly after.

Wire spread it wide through Hughes and Westerman, Gidley then turned it inside to Ratchford who’s support run gave the stand-off/scrum half/centre/full back/loose forward (delete as appropriate) a deserved try.

Stef had been good all evening, as he very often is, but there always seems to be a debate amongst some of our fans over whether he’s actually any good. His biggest strength – his versatility – is taken as a weakness by his critics who seem to see him not really being good enough to nail down a single position as opposed to him actually being really good in a variety of them. Opinions, eh?

Widnes grabbed a consolation through Marsh in the corner, we’ll not mention the fumble which looked suspiciously like a knock on in the build-up though, because as we all know Hicks didn’t give Widnes a chance.

You know it’s not going well when home fans start dicking around with the torches on their phones for entertainment or when the bloke waving the big Northern Soul flag couldn’t seem to work it properly and promptly gave up.

As the clock ticked down, Evans broke down the right. The Wales international had plenty of options in support and chose Ratchord to trot in to complete the rout.

There was just enough time left for the travelling Wire fans to politely inform the Chemics players grouped behind the sticks what we thought of their ability. The chants of “you’re fucking shit” wasn’t directly aimed at Corey Thompson, but he did seem to take it to heart, the poor lad.

Don’t worry, mate. You’ll probably play in Widnes’ cup final again next year.

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